Monthly Archives: July 2016


I know he was just a kitten but it hurts so deep in my spirit that he is gone.

He was on my porch. No mother. Just a day old kitten. Eyes still closed. Screaming for help. I picked him up and instantly fell in love.

That was Father’s Day weekend.

July first he opened his eyes. He was crying for his bottle. I fed him and cleaned him. He kept crying and I tried to comfort him and then he just went limp. He was gone. I held him and cried asking God why did he die. I held him until he was no longer warm. I just didn’t want to let him go. I cried the rest of the day and in to Saturday. I thought I would be better about it today but I’m not.

It is really sad that I feel empty and with no purpose now. Especially since I have a husband and a  daughter. But they really never make me feel as though they want or need me for anything. I know that is not true. I am just really hurt.

He was my pretty boy. I looked forward to when he would wake me to be fed at 4 in the morning. He loved having his belly rubbed and laying on my chest to sleep.

Now that is all gone and I just feel empty and a lost.

This is him. My daughter’s friend named him Ayato. But to me he was my pretty boy.IMG_20160624_155150 (1)